Nobody knows better than South Korea how elusive the floor can be when markets are crying fire-sale. Pushed to the wall during the Asia Crisis a decade ago, the country’s banks had their assets priced in the pennies-on-the-dollar range. Here now, with the shoe squarely on the other foot, is Korea Asset Management, a government debt clearer that says its purchase of illiquid Merrill Lynch debt securities is faltering over price. Local media reported in July that Kamco planned to raise up to 2 trillion won ($1.98 billion) to buy U.S. non-performing loans with Shinhan Bank and Mirae Asset Securities. Kamco had said it was in the process of raising about $1 billion to buy distressed mortgage assets from U.S. banks and expected double-digit returns from its investments. Hardly the kind of buying clout that Merrill faced when it agreed to sell $30.6 billion of collateralized debt obligations to a Lone Star affiliate in July for 22 cents on the dollar. If nothing else, execs at Lehman Brothers will be watching this high-stakes haggling with much nervous interest as they negotiate with another South Korean state-owned institution, Korea Development Bank, over a possible joint investment in the CDO-laden U.S. investment bank.

Other deals of the day:

* Novolipetsk Steel, the Russian steel maker owned by billionaire Vladimir Lisin, has agreed to pay $400 million in cash to acquire U.S. hot-rolled steel maker Beta Steel and expand its presence in North America.

* InBev is to hold an extraordinary shareholders meeting on Sept. 29 to vote on its planned $52 billion takeover of Anheuser Busch and related matters.

* Private equity firm Advent International has taken a majority stake in Swiss duty-free retailer Dufry by means of a share swap that combines it with the U.S. firm’s airport retailer Hudson. Dufry, which already held an 11.2 percent stake in Hudson that it bought in April, said it was swapping Hudson’s common stock for Dufry equity and refinancing its approximately $390 million in debt. The total value of Hudson’s equity is $446 million.

Coke pulled off the single largest takeover in Chinese history overnight, offering to buy juice maker Huiyuan for three times what the company was worth. Braving a notoriously difficult foreign M&A environment, where the state dominates the corporate sector and pumps out reams of regulatory red tape and where nationalistic pride often triggers protests when foreign firms gain influence over domestic firms. Since capitalism is good these days, that premium should go a long way toward suppressing any nationalistic distaste with the deal. Interesting to note that Chinese inbound corporate deals so far are up 30 percent from a year ago, to $15.3 billion.

Hedge fund manager Ospraie Management will close its flagship fund after it plunged 27 percent in August on losses in energy, mining and natural resources equity holdings, in one of the biggest ever closures of a commodities-focused hedge fund. The closure of the fund, announced by the firm’s founder Dwight Anderson in a letter to investors on Tuesday, could be more bad news for Lehman Brothers, which took a 20 percent stake in the hedge fund manager in 2005. One expert said the closure of the fund, which at the time of the letter’s writing had lost 38.59 percent this year, may also have played a role in bringing down U.S. stocks yesterday, which fell after initially climbing more than 1 percent. Lehman shares were down more than 3 percent in after-hours trading.

Other deals of the day:

* South Korea’s military savings fund would consider joining Korea Development Bank in a bid for Lehman Brothers if KDB made such an offer, as now appears a good time for U.S. investments, the fund’s chairman said.

* Friends Provident, Britain’s smallest blue-chip life insurer, will not sell its Lombard and F&C units if it cannot get a good price, recently appointed chief executive Trevor Matthews said.

* Mitsubishi UFJ Financial Group will likely fold one of its small consumer finance units into affiliate Acom, a newspaper said, the latest move by a Japanese bank to strengthen its position in the struggling consumer lending market. Mitsubishi UFJ, Japan’s largest bank, will seek to merge unlisted DC Cash One with Acom, the Nikkei newspaper said.

* Irish supermarket group Superquinn has received six expressions of interest from potential bidders, including Britain’s Asda and J Sainsbury, the Irish Times newspaper said.

It’s sweatervests versus suits. Posterboards versus Excel spreadsheets. A lot of money versus a lot more money…it all boils down to consultants versus investment bankers. Need to know more? The smackdown between the two professions is chronicled on a hip-hop style video 

circulating Wall Street.

Ties and pocket protectors fly as both sides assert their dominance in the video, “Damn, It Feels Good to be a Banker.”

The video was posted Thursday on the wildly-popular blog Leveraged Sell-Out, which spoofs the antics of Wall Street’s ingenues.

The video helps promote a book written by Leveraged Sell-Out’s creator, Princeton graduate Amit Chatwani.

So who wins the hip-hop showdown? You decide–

Consultant: “You’re playing with Excel, doing nothing but grunt work. I’m analyzing both qualitative AND quantitative research (OH!).”

Banker: “I got a house in the Hamptons and a penthouse loft.

But you’ve got intangibles, is that why your skills are so soft?

–Deepa Seetharaman

This won’t be a revelation to private equity bankers — but August was officially quiet for deals.

The summer month typically marks a dearth of transactions as bankers head out to the beach, but last month was exceptionally slow.

The dollar value of deals involving private equity sank to the lowest for four years, $21.7 billion globally on 206 deals, according to data from Thomson Reuters.

Two years ago, private equity deals during the August heat — which already post-dated the initial popping of the credit bubble — amounted to $47 billion.

With just months to go before bonuses are calculated, the pressure’s surely on to make up some of the dealflow before year end.

Nobody knows better than South Korea how elusive the floor can be when markets are crying fire-sale. Pushed to the wall during the Asia Crisis a decade ago, the country’s banks had their assets priced in the pennies-on-the-dollar range. Here now, with the shoe squarely on the other foot, is Korea Asset Management, a government debt clearer that says its purchase of illiquid Merrill Lynch debt securities is faltering over price. Local media reported in July that Kamco planned to raise up to 2 trillion won ($1.98 billion) to buy U.S. non-performing loans with Shinhan Bank and Mirae Asset Securities. Kamco had said it was in the process of raising about $1 billion to buy distressed mortgage assets from U.S. banks and expected double-digit returns from its investments. Hardly the kind of buying clout that Merrill faced when it agreed to sell $30.6 billion of collateralized debt obligations to a Lone Star affiliate in July for 22 cents on the dollar. If nothing else, execs at Lehman Brothers will be watching this high-stakes haggling with much nervous interest as they negotiate with another South Korean state-owned institution, Korea Development Bank, over a possible joint investment in the CDO-laden U.S. investment bank.

Other deals of the day:

* Novolipetsk Steel, the Russian steel maker owned by billionaire Vladimir Lisin, has agreed to pay $400 million in cash to acquire U.S. hot-rolled steel maker Beta Steel and expand its presence in North America.

* InBev is to hold an extraordinary shareholders meeting on Sept. 29 to vote on its planned $52 billion takeover of Anheuser Busch and related matters.

* Private equity firm Advent International has taken a majority stake in Swiss duty-free retailer Dufry by means of a share swap that combines it with the U.S. firm’s airport retailer Hudson. Dufry, which already held an 11.2 percent stake in Hudson that it bought in April, said it was swapping Hudson’s common stock for Dufry equity and refinancing its approximately $390 million in debt. The total value of Hudson’s equity is $446 million.

Coke pulled off the single largest takeover in Chinese history overnight, offering to buy juice maker Huiyuan for three times what the company was worth. Braving a notoriously difficult foreign M&A environment, where the state dominates the corporate sector and pumps out reams of regulatory red tape and where nationalistic pride often triggers protests when foreign firms gain influence over domestic firms. Since capitalism is good these days, that premium should go a long way toward suppressing any nationalistic distaste with the deal. Interesting to note that Chinese inbound corporate deals so far are up 30 percent from a year ago, to $15.3 billion.

Hedge fund manager Ospraie Management will close its flagship fund after it plunged 27 percent in August on losses in energy, mining and natural resources equity holdings, in one of the biggest ever closures of a commodities-focused hedge fund. The closure of the fund, announced by the firm’s founder Dwight Anderson in a letter to investors on Tuesday, could be more bad news for Lehman Brothers, which took a 20 percent stake in the hedge fund manager in 2005. One expert said the closure of the fund, which at the time of the letter’s writing had lost 38.59 percent this year, may also have played a role in bringing down U.S. stocks yesterday, which fell after initially climbing more than 1 percent. Lehman shares were down more than 3 percent in after-hours trading.

Other deals of the day:

* South Korea’s military savings fund would consider joining Korea Development Bank in a bid for Lehman Brothers if KDB made such an offer, as now appears a good time for U.S. investments, the fund’s chairman said.

* Friends Provident, Britain’s smallest blue-chip life insurer, will not sell its Lombard and F&C units if it cannot get a good price, recently appointed chief executive Trevor Matthews said.

* Mitsubishi UFJ Financial Group will likely fold one of its small consumer finance units into affiliate Acom, a newspaper said, the latest move by a Japanese bank to strengthen its position in the struggling consumer lending market. Mitsubishi UFJ, Japan’s largest bank, will seek to merge unlisted DC Cash One with Acom, the Nikkei newspaper said.

* Irish supermarket group Superquinn has received six expressions of interest from potential bidders, including Britain’s Asda and J Sainsbury, the Irish Times newspaper said.

It’s sweatervests versus suits. Posterboards versus Excel spreadsheets. A lot of money versus a lot more money…it all boils down to consultants versus investment bankers. Need to know more? The smackdown between the two professions is chronicled on a hip-hop style video 

circulating Wall Street.

Ties and pocket protectors fly as both sides assert their dominance in the video, “Damn, It Feels Good to be a Banker.”

The video was posted Thursday on the wildly-popular blog Leveraged Sell-Out, which spoofs the antics of Wall Street’s ingenues.

The video helps promote a book written by Leveraged Sell-Out’s creator, Princeton graduate Amit Chatwani.

So who wins the hip-hop showdown? You decide–

Consultant: “You’re playing with Excel, doing nothing but grunt work. I’m analyzing both qualitative AND quantitative research (OH!).”

Banker: “I got a house in the Hamptons and a penthouse loft.

But you’ve got intangibles, is that why your skills are so soft?

–Deepa Seetharaman